Sending to Daycare for the first time...ease my mind PLEASE!!!
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Hi! I'm a first time mom and sending my 5 month old daughter to daycare for the first time next month. Although I feel super confident in her daycare, I'm just overall kind of in a funk and feeling nervous. Any advice from any veteran working mamas who have been in the same boat before? Good vibes only please!TY!!!
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Oh I know this feeling and it is SO HARD. It’s really hard. When I dropped my first daughter at daycare I cried and cried. So much so that the Director of the place walked me to my car the first day because I just couldn’t leave. I just could not leave my baby.
And then….once things settled, it was the greatest relief. I was working full time, my husband was deployed, I did not realize until I let go, the anxiety I was holding. Once I knew she was safe and sound, I felt so much relief. I realized I could be a working mom, my child would be cared for, and I could (try) to find a balance. I’m a mom of three, most who I took to daycare at 6-9 weeks old because I had to, but as a mama who has done it: some days are really tough, but you got this! Give yourself grace, all the feelings you have are valid. One of the most amazing things is all the awesome caregivers they will meet and friends your children meet along the way
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You will have a harder time than she will 🩷 you know yourself best. Either take the day off from work and go get a massage or go to work to stay busy. That first day call the daycare to check in and give yourself some peace of mind.
You totally got this. All my kids were daycare babies and are thriving!!! The biggest thing is to find a preschool you feel good about. If you feel confident in the school and care then you can let go.
Tbh daycare rules -
All three of my kids have gone to daycare, and you’ll have a really hard first day but they’re in great hands. Just know they’re adjusting too so sleep may be interesting the first few days, or it may be like my kids where they finally slept through the night when they started daycare. See if the teachers can get photos to you the first few days.
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I've had 3 day care babies...I think the more people to love your kids the better! Some other "pros" to help ease your mind:
*I lean into daycare to help fill gaps of things I'm not great at (like teaching reading or starting potty training).
*If you allow, the teachers/school will become an extension of your family.
*Your baby may get sick at first but my kids didn't miss a day of school in kindergarten for illness.
*I agree that sleep may be a little wonky for a couple of days but then she'll likely sleep better
*Our teachers are another set of eyes on my child "have you noticed my kid doing xyz lately, in your experience what do you think about that?" "My kid is having trouble with potty training, any ideas?" etc
*Daycare teachers make the best babysitters because they already know your child. You don't have to leave instructions! They can even do overnights for you guys if needed. Not to mention they are professionally trained and educated in early childhood development
*And maybe my favorite use of daycare...when you can try to wrap up work a little early on fridays and go on a happy hour date with your husband before pick up "free" childcare!Basically use daycare to it's full advantage and allow the teachers to become part of your family
You got this!!!!!! (and so does she!)
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One good thing about starting early is that there won't be much of a transition for her! So that's good!! I've also had daycare kids and something not mentioned that I super appreciate about daycare is that if a teacher is sick/has to miss for any reason, the school figures it out. It's not your responsibility to find back up care like it would be if you had a nanny. Less stress for a working mom.
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Day 1 will be the hardest (on you)! Go back to your car and let yourself cry! Not because you’re scared, but because change is hard and means they’re growing up! That’s ok! Then do something for yourself! Get a coffee, massage, manicure or even just returning to work (if you are). Do what makes you feel yourself again. Also, set reasonable expectations. At home, you have 1 kid and staying on a schedule is easier than for a teacher who has several schedules (likely all very similar). Know it will not be perfect, but they are loving your child and trying to be as perfect as possible! Let that be enough instead of obsessing over a couple of minutes! After a couple of weeks, you’ll feel better and in a good routine!! Good luck, mom!
