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7 year old - anger and tone

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Tweens and Teens
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  • M Offline
    M Offline
    MotherShip
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Our 7 year old boys anger and tone has gotten so awful and disrespectful. HELP!! What has worked or is working for everyone?!

    He will just yell NO! NO! , or YOU STOP!!

    Makes me want to smack him, it’s so rude!!

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    • SustainableMamaS Offline
      SustainableMamaS Offline
      SustainableMama Expert
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Hi @MotherShip I’m glad you asked about this. It sounds like he may be vying for more power/control in the world. It’s common at this age for kids to stop responding to “can you please…” or “hey. You need to…” if we are sort of making a lot of requests or corrections through the day. Some things that may help include:

      1. Bringing him to the table - to get his ideas for how it can go better. Ie. “Hey. I notice you saying ‘no’ a lot. So what ideas do you have for how we can make those situations better?” (Note - he may ask you to stop nagging or something like that. If so - consider option 2)

      2. arrive to come across a bit more like an equal, in making requests. Ie. “Hey. The table needs to get set. What part do you think you could help with and what part should I do?” “What ideas do you have for getting your room clean this weekend?”

      3. May as many agreements in advance as possible. I find kids at this age are less likely to do things when asked in the moment- but more cooperative when it’s been agreed ahead of time. Is. If he has a daily chore and it is written on the fridge each day, or there is a container of chore options and he is asked to choose one each day - before tech or friend time, then when you are nudging him with a reminder it can sound more like, “remember- when you are done with the chore, u can absolutely head to your iPad” or “wait. I notice you are about to walk out the door and your chore isn’t done yet,”.

      And here are few other thoughts on the topic : https://sustainableparenting.com/sassing-interrupting-and-pushing-boundaries-more-and-more/

      Helping parents become Sustainable Parents:
      filling the gap between gentle parenting and harsh discipline, so you can parent with kindness and firmness at the SAME time, and parenting finally feels sustainable.

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