Friends? FOMO?
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Truthfully, I have next to no energy for anything except enjoying my hubs and kids and feel like they are wonderful friends, partners in crime, and this family-centric chapter is exactly what I want to be doing. But. That part of me who has always been a little insecure about making and keeping friends is having a hard time. We didn't know anyone when we moved here and have a few friends, but mostly just ancillary acquaintances. I definitely try, but it is hard to make friends in this chapter and hard to keep up with the "maintenance" to foster those friendships into something deeper with kids and life. Sometimes, I see other people with much tighter friend/mom/couple groups (especially doing things together with their fam) or find myself not invited to gatherings within our circle and feel left out. I also know as the kids get bigger, a lot of our friendships may be dictated by what they like, which families they want to hang out with, and who is in their class, etc., but I still can't shake the feeling. Anyone have thoughts?
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I definitely understand this! The easiest thing I've found is to schedule 1 or 2 recurring meetups like a weekly early morning walk. To me, the scheduling is what is exhausting for maintaining friendships and this helps cut down on that. And just have a mutual agreement that it is no big deal if you need to cancel here and there. I like 1 on 1 time and as an introvert this is less tiring than group hangouts so it works for me!
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The older I get the higher quality but less friends I have. You can’t be everything to everyone-or shouldn’t want to be.
I do think mom friends are important but you only need a few. Can you overlap with something you’re already doing? Schedule a volunteer time at the school with a friend? Workout together?
