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Husband is Depressed

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Marriage and Partnership
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  • S Offline
    S Offline
    Salmon Cricket
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    I can tell my husband is depressed. He has been for a while and I’m just unsure how to support him right now. Not to mention we have 3 kids and I’m feeling super burnt out carrying the emotional load of the family. He’s snappy with the kids and it’s the biggest turn off. Any ideas to help him get back to normal?

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    • O Offline
      O Offline
      Orange Yak
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      I'm so sorry you're going through this. I have 3 kids too and have definitely been depressed. So has my husband. Individual therapy has helped me so much. I started anti depressants recently too, and it's been GREAT. But, if someone was asking my husband this question when I was at my lowest - I think I would say: hang out with me... listen to me without offering me a solution... show me that you SEE me. I hope this is helpful!!!

      SustainableMamaS 1 Reply Last reply
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      • G Offline
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        Green Lizard
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        We’ve been there. Things got really bad and desperate and I basically had to say “start therapy or we need time apart.”
        Painful for everyone but also painful for everyone to watch him continue a downward spiral.
        He’s doing MUCH better now.
        Sorry you’re going through this

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          Orange Vulture
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          3 kids is no joke and its not easy, we've been there. We were trying to avoid going on medication so we had him go to a functional medicine doctor and get full labs drawn. She recommended certain supplements to help where he was lacking, as well as tested his testosterone.

          As a family we also tried to stop drinking, get enough sleep every night and slow down and start to say "no" more. I feel like society doesn't make parenting easy, and we have trouble "keeping up" with all the activities sports etc.

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          • SustainableMamaS Offline
            SustainableMamaS Offline
            SustainableMama Expert
            replied to Orange Yak on last edited by
            #5

            @Orange-Yak I completely agree with everything you said! 🫶🏼❤️

            Helping parents become Sustainable Parents:
            filling the gap between gentle parenting and harsh discipline, so you can parent with kindness and firmness at the SAME time, and parenting finally feels sustainable.

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            • B Offline
              B Offline
              bluedolphin
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              I hear you! We have recently started couples counseling and my husband has opened up about symptoms of depression. We are going to start doing some individual sessions to help that. Cutting alcohol, seeing a functional medicine doctor to check out all labs and can recommend supplements also helped. It’s a hard season of life with little kids and just give grace. I have seen wonderful changes in my husband but the person has to be open to trying to change things. Unfortunately, we had to hit “Rock bottom” for drastic change. Hoping your husband will be open to some help and change.

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